Whenever we reflect on the love story of Lord Ram and Goddess Sita, two incidents often evoke questions regarding his actions:
- Requesting his wife to undergo a trial by fire to prove her purity.
- Leaving his pregnant wife in the forest due to societal doubts about her chastity after residing in another person’s home for an extended period.
Let us review key incidents from his life to determine whether he displayed misogynistic behaviors.
- It all began when Sage Vishwamitra enlisted Lord Ram and his brother, Lord Lakshman, to safeguard his sacrificial rites from the demons Tadaka, Subahu, and Mareech. As Sage Vishwamitra initiated his rituals, the trio emerged to disrupt the proceedings. While Lord Ram and Lord Lakshman valiantly engaged with Mareech and Subahu, Lord Ram hesitated to confront Tadaka due to her gender. He believed that harming a woman constituted a grave transgression. However, Sage Vishvamitra reassured Lord Ram that eliminating Tadaka was justified, clarifying that she was no ordinary woman but a demoness whose presence had rendered the forest desolate, despite two thriving cities once inhabiting the area.
- The second significant event unfolds when Lord Ram’s stepmother, Queen Kaikeyi, urged her husband to exile Lord Ram for 14 years and crown her biological son, Lord Bharat. Despite this request, Lord Ram graciously accepted the decree, maintaining his unwavering respect for his stepmother. On one occasion, Lakshman criticized Kaikeyi in front of Lord Ram, attributing the exile to her actions. This provoked Lord Ram, who sternly asserted, “Never speak ill of my mother.”
- Lord Ram hesitated to bring his wife, Goddess Sita, into the forest, as she was accustomed to a life of luxury as a princess. The forest posed safety concerns, and the harsh living conditions were a stark contrast to her previous comforts. Despite Lord Ram’s initial reluctance, he eventually acquiesced to Sita’s persistent requests and accompanied her to the forest. For Sita, the greatest anguish lay in being separated from her beloved husband. It is worth noting that it was Sita’s choice to accompany Lord Ram to the forest, rather than being taken against her will.
- The conflict between Lord Ram and Bali, the brother of Sugriva, stems from a tragic misunderstanding. While it may appear that Lord Ram could have reconciled the situation and sought assistance from both brothers, the reality was more complex. Bali’s grave transgression involved the abduction of Sugriva’s wife and his reprehensible act of coercion. In the eyes of Lord Ram, there is no greater offense than violating a woman’s agency, be it a wife, daughter, sister, daughter-in-law, or sister-in-law. Lord Ram’s principles emphasize the importance of respecting a woman’s autonomy and unequivocally condemn any form of non-consensual behavior.
- The Surpanakha incident: Everyone holds Lakshman responsible for Sita’s abduction. He hadn’t slit her nose, and she hadn’t approached Ravan to beg him to kidnap Sita. Indeed, we have some partiality. Instead, he ought to have killed her. She wanted to kill Sita in order to wed Lord Ram, but as Surpanakha was a woman, she was left alive with a slit nose. Had there been a male demon, Lakshman would have immediately killed him for attempting to murder his sister-in-law.
In the following section, we will explore the reasons behind Lord Ram’s request for fire from his wife and the circumstances surrounding his wife’s abduction.